The Ladybird Book of The Midlife Crisis

THE PERFECT GIFT for anyone who likes a glass of red. And a double gin. And a vodka shot. And a flaming tequila. And a candy floss caipirinha . . . and a small Bahama Mama.

"A good hangover should be a total mystery to you. How did this happen? Why do you feel so ill?

Pretend to yourself that you drank less than you did. Insist you stuck to beer, forgetting the champagne at the start of the evening and the round of jalapeno tequilas you did for a bet in that club next to the dual carriageway at 2am."

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"What a confusing world it can seem with a hangover.

Sit as still as you can. Do not attempt to make any decisions.

Look out of the window. Can you recognise simple shapes or colours? Is there a moon or a sun in the sky? What sort of a name might you have? Where might there be bacon?"